


What We Know

by sunlitflowers



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Drug Use, Emotional Abuse, F/F, F/M, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Mental Abuse, Physical Abuse, Teacher-Student Relationship, Teen Pregnancy, belle and rumple are secret, daddy kink talk, david and mary margaret are just happy to be here, dorothy and ruby are slow burn, emma and neal are living on a prayer, miscarriage by abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-14
Updated: 2016-06-19
Packaged: 2018-07-14 23:00:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 12,960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7194356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunlitflowers/pseuds/sunlitflowers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What everyone knew was that Neal "Bonfire" Cassidy was the reason troublemakers existed. What they also knew was that Belle French was destined to grow up to be mayor or President. What nobody knew was why the two had been best friends since the sixth grade, or that it was Belle who started the fire, or why Neal doesn't have the same last name as his father.  As they enter into their first year of Storybrooke College, people will find out things they wished they didn't one by one.</p><p>alternatively : Belle's hair's so big because she knows everybody's secrets.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Neal's Secret

Belle French’s birthday was four days before her best friend Neal Cassidy’s. When they were in elementary, it was always a competition as their parties tended to happen on the same day thanks to a noble, combative effort from their fathers and the teacher. This lasted all the way up until the sixth grade when parties were now held at the park, the skating rink, or anywhere cooler. Neal had the brilliant idea of wanting a co-ed party and came up with the brilliant idea of his and Belle’s be mixed together. Her friends encouraged this. Peer pressure won out and she agreed. Over the next few years, Belle grew more into her books and studies and lost friends. Neal started cutting class and entered into the ‘you don’t understand me’ phase, but always remained. Seven years of battling each other finally came to an end.

When Belle got accepted into Princeton, everybody believed that was where she was going after graduation. She made no time to tell anyone different and before she knew, there was a big party to celebrate. Neal, Ruby, and maybe Ashley and Mary Margaret were the only ones she knew that cared about whether or not she got into the college of her dreams. She partied anyway, let Neal introduce her to his new girlfriend, and had a genuinely good time. For all of twenty minutes, until she heard an explosion deep down in the woods. Not seeing Neal around and knowing his father would kill her if anything happened to his boy, she took off without telling anyone where she was going. 

She found Neal dancing around a huge fire with a broken neck of an alcohol bottle in his hand. 

“Neal, what did you do?” Belle yelled at him, going over and trying to get the sharp object away from him.

“Wouldn’t you like to know.” He slurred in her direction. She stepped back, visibly confused. “You’re going to leave after everything you’ve done.” 

“Okay, okay. Let’s just calm down. Give me that bottle and I’ll take the wrap for this.” Sirens were calling in the distance getting closer and closer. Neal had enough trouble following him into his eighteen year old life. Mr Gold was going to be livid if he got into trouble again. Belle would be tried as an adult, but had a clean slate. The fire was contained. It wouldn’t be as bad for her. Neal finally ceased and dropped the bottle. He hugged her shoulders. 

“I can’t lose my friend.” 

“You’re not going to.” She promised, petting his hair. Belle felt a little humbled and loved that was the reason he was acting so crazy. The cops, firemen, and ambulance were all parking. She and Neal walked towards them, he still leaned over on her. “Where’d Emma go, Butch?” 

“Ditched her. I don’t want her to see this, Kid.” He motioned towards himself. Belle rolled her eyes. “Take after pop, I guess.” Her body warmed and electrified at the thought of Mr Gold a little drunk and disheveled.

Belle wasn’t let off with a warning. She got the short end of a stick and a mistrial where someone said she was gloating about setting all of Enchanted Woods up in flames. Taking the people she hung out with didn’t help. Neal had a long record, Ruby was always a penchant for flirting with danger, Mary Margaret believed in every person’s goodness, and Ashley didn’t know her well enough. Had Neal not convinced Mr Gold to represent her in court, she would have gotten upwards to a year for reckless burning in the second degree. She then spent June through beginning of September under probation and house arrest.

Neal didn’t believe that she never planned on going to Princeton and in turn blamed himself. He also never told her what had actually caused the explosion of the bonfire out of the guilt. Belle never confessed her feelings towards Mr Gold. Mr Gold never shared with either student that he was the new professor of law at Storybrooke College, replacing Regina Mills so she could take over as mayor following the election. As nearly every high school graduate entered into the halls of the college, each one brought a pound of baggage weighing on their shoulders. Unbeknownst to them, all it took was one admission before their land came crashing down.


	2. Mr Gold's Secret

Once you kiss a man twice your age, you begin to learn everything there is to know about him. If he makes excuses as to why he’s doing this, his wife is terrible, his job is terrible, etcetera etcetera, he’s just looking for a good lay with a younger person. If he kisses you with all the elements except for earth to keep him grounded, he’s just hungry. If his fingers hurt when pressed into your backside, he’s searching for something he thinks is buried in your flesh. 

Mr Gold never kissed Belle French that way. At least, not after the first time. The first he was later admittedly starving for affection and attention he hadn’t felt in a long time. It was in his office right after she was released from her arson sentence. All she’d wanted and intended was to thank the man with a bouquet of roses from her garden she had grown all summer. Belle had given some away already to her friends that came by for well wishes and to give her new books. Her fingers had gently touched his and lingered there. She was practically begging him to make that move they’d been dancing around all season when he came to visit as her lawyer. During her trial the two of them had been put up in separate hotel rooms, but the thrill was still in her veins.

Getting up to go to Storybrooke College had taken everything out of her. They had made a deal not to see each other while she was in school to focus on her studies and doing this every other student did. Parties, all night study sessions, a hook up or two, whatever. Gold seemed to be fine with. Belle had been so in love with him and their time together that she didn’t want to ruin it by saying she wasn’t moving away to Princeton. Neal had been avoiding her all summer to explain the misunderstanding to him. Anytime either Gold or Neal had wanted to check on her they sent someone else. Emma said Neal was heartbroken, distraught, and blamed himself for Belle not being able to go to the school of her dreams. Whoever Gold sent never talked to her about school. 

Belle had worried about how many friends were going to stand by her through the first day of College. She nearly cried when Ruby was standing outside the curb leaning against a red Camaro. Nothing like Gold’s Cadillac or Emma’s brand new Beetle that Neal ‘found’ for her birthday, but still welcome all of the same. Belle skipped towards Ruby who enveloped her in a huge and tight hug. Ruby was the only one in the world that knew of Belle’s affair. She had been put off by it for a little while, but accepted it. Gold had saved Belle from twenty years to life for arson, was someone she knew almost better than Neal did at this point, and was just the kind of guy they were going to scout out for her on the trip to Europe. ‘Aged like fine wine that would make her go down easy’, as they both laughed about one night talking on the football field before all of this.

“So, did he give you anything for the first day of school?” Ruby teased when they were in the car driving to the college. It being so close to everything, people just lived off campus. The dorms were turned into an office building for teachers instead.

“If you’re looking for a wonderful story on how we made love by a moonlit lake to an old seventies record before I darted away at morning, you’ll be disappointed.” Belle readjusted her book bag and made sure she had everything. A laptop, primarily, and the heinously priced text. Gold had found her one for free, a class on law he’d convinced her to take at Princeton.

“I’m so romantically depraved that actually sounds kind of nice.” Ruby smiled to herself, but laughed it off as though it were a joke. 

“Well, that may be, but no man is going to satiate what you want and pass the ‘good enough for you’ test.” Ruby nodded, not saying anything, and parked her car. They were out twenty seconds before Ruby was bombarded by a girl Belle didn’t know. She stood there awkwardly while the two caught up.

“This is Dorothy.” Ruby finally introduced.

“Nice to meet you. I’m Belle.” 

“Dorothy is President of the Athena Program.” Ruby stated proud of her friend.

“Is…that how the two of you met?” 

“Nope. I snuck into a college bowl in May. She was giving out the questions.” Belle nodded, wanting to smile but not wanting them to be uncomfortable. She reached into her bag and pulled out the first book she could find.

“I’ll leave you to it. I need to talk to the Professor over this book.” 

Belle had planned on taking her time and exploring the hallways of the community college. It was no different than a high school, which made her hate this all that much more. Her life, her dreams she always talked about with Neal and Gold were in Princeton. A new life for starters. One that didn’t have every person she walked by talk about the awful rumors that apparently had been created. She killed a guy, threw a fit because Neal had chosen Emma Swan over her, was actually a nut case, and some combination of the three. She hurried along into her first class of the day. Forty minutes early, but worth it to be out of the line of fire she so cleverly avoided since June. That stupid mistrial had with the fake witness had ruined her entire life.

Seeing the man she slept with every other weekend standing at the front of the classroom was the highlight of the cherry on the proverbial cake. Belle wanted to be mad at Gold for not telling her this, but why would he? And when? He had been under the impression she was heading off to another state and would never see each other until the holidays. All they done for weeks was sleep together, have sex, eat maybe, fool around, sleep, repeat process. When they did talk about the future or plans, it was always with such sadness about breaking their current relationship that it didn’t last very long. Right then, Belle didn’t even want to talk. The sleeves of his shirt were rolled up to his elbows and tucked into his trousers. His hair looked like he attempted to do something with it, but fluttered around his face. He looked nothing other than desirable. 

“Professor? I wanted to talk to you about this book?” Belle called, reaching behind her and shutting the door. 

“Brevity is the soul of wit, but you are much too early, miss-” he stopped when he saw who was walking towards him. “Belle.” She couldn’t help herself. She hustled forward and wrapped her arms around his neck.

“Neal didn’t tell you.” 

“He said something about it, but I didn’t think it’d be true. Are you in my class?” 

“Tragically. It’s part of my good faith, that I’m a changed woman. So, I’ll need your office hours. Sir.” She played, pulling him down to kiss his mouth then smiled up at him.

“Join clubs, hang out with friends, anything you can do to be a human being will help you get out of probation.” He advised, only slightly as her lawyer.

“Keep sneaking around with you. How did you get this job?” Belle felt quite proud of him, as though he were more than just her night time stop.

“Regina stepped up as Mayor and they were a little bit desperate.” 

“Or knew the best man for this. If I’d known, we would have celebrated.” She bit her lip coyly while pulling his waist closer to hers. His body certainly wasn’t opposed to the idea. Gold wrapped her up in his arms. He kissed her, all careful and nervous and like she was some heart breaker. He was the one to do so with her chest when he pulled back.

“Class. Get to your seat. Neal and Emma are moving in together at some loft with Blanchard and Nolan.”

“Without me?” She said without thinking. Everyone getting a shitty apartment for college had been her and Neal's plan. 

“I like it as much as you do, dearie.” Gold rubbed her back as a part of some kind of sympathy. She cleared her throat and looked back up to him as people started filing in to their seats.

“It may be late, but I’ll be there.” Apparently she and Neal had a lot to talk about.

Classes went by as well as they could have considering her first one of the week was taught by Mr Gold. He was undeniably super intelligent when it came to politics, government, law, and the way it all worked and how much it affected them. He wanted them to be angry with Regina Mills appointing herself Mayor and their former classmate David Nolan becoming sheriff with no voting. It took everything out of this democracy. Belle could understand his point, but she and him always differed. He was way more harsh than she was on their punishments. If he were in control, the lawbreakers would be turned into slugs and stomped on by children all hyped up on sugar.

Belle was in the middle of writing down her sixth first day assignment when Emma Swan approached her.

“Can we talk? I need to ask for your advise on something.”


	3. Emma's Secret

That Emma Swan was in a state of distraught, exhaust, and looking terrible, was an understatement. Even if Emma wasn’t her best friend’s girl and they barely knew each other, Belle would want to help as best as she could. This was far beyond first day back at school jitters and that scared Belle even more. She worried instantly something happened to Neal seeing as she hadn’t seen him all day. Assuring that wasn’t the case didn't make Belle feel anymore at ease, unsurprisingly enough. She cared so much about every person that was close to her. One degree of separation be damned. Belle closed her notebook, gathered up her satchel, and followed Emma out of the library and into one of the girl’s bathrooms. 

Emma kicked every single door open and then locked the bathroom door from the inside using a bobby pin pulled from her hair. Belle stood by in awe at the action. People always said opposites attract and she had secretly wanted Neal to end up with a do-good that steered him on a better path towards success. He instead found an equal match. Emma could run circles around Neal’s antics and keep him in line all at the same time. She was cute, independent, resourceful, and smart. Belle approved tenfold. Which is what made this interaction all the more unnerving.

“So, why are you coming to me instead of Blanchard? I thought you guys were close.” Belle asked, carefully so as not to seem rude. 

“Yeah, well. Mary Margaret is basically the mother I never had which means she’s going to give me a mothering answer.” Emma said this like it were a bad thing. She turned towards Belle and held her shoulders. “You know Neal better than anyone else.”

“I don’t really think that I know him better than you-” 

“Five month relationship versus one since the sixth grade? Yeah,you haven’t seen each other all summer, but you got me beat.” She pointed to herself then Belle who felt a little flattered. 

“Okay, well, what’s up? You’re kind of scaring me.” She attempted to laugh off. Emma crossed her arms over her chest.

“You and me both.” Emma was looking at her as though trying to telepathically ask what she needed to instead of saying out loud. It took Belle a solid minute before her jaw dropped.

“You’re not asking me what you should do are you?”

“No, no, I mean…what would you do? I wanted to ask you how he’s going to react.” Belle placed a hand on her stomach as though Gold’s sperm from three nights ago was planting a life within her just based off of this conversation alone to scare her. 

“Tell him. I can tell you a lot of things about this, but not how he’s going to react.” A thought popped into her mind. “I can find out for you?” 

“You cannot tell him for me, though.” Emma warned. Belle shook her head, fairly confident with this idea. She placed a comforting hand on Emma’s shoulder and smiled before hugging her. It was stiff and more than a little awkward, but Emma did return the affection. Belle promised this would stay between the two of them.

Emma told Belle where she could probably find Neal since he was skipping out of classes after find out his father was teaching. Belle promised everything was going to be just fine and then went somewhere else other than the abandoned playground. She knew that not telling Gold this would be easy, as talking about pregnancy was not something she was ready for right now. His barely legal girlfriend shouldn’t be the one telling him he was maybe going to be a grandfather either. That opened a whole ‘nother conversation they long since worked through, but still remained a touchy subject. No, she needed someone else who knew this from first hand experience.

Ashley Boyd was a few years ahead of her, but the scandal of her teen pregnancy had rocked the small town of Storybrooke. She was closer to Ruby and Mary Margaret, Dorothy by extension possibly, but Ashley was always a sweet girl and very open about this topic. Especially considering that she brought her little Alexandra to class every single day and maintained the grades she had as high school valedictorian. If there was anybody that Emma should have at least considered talking about this with, it should have been Ashley. Or, at least, Ashley’s boyfriend Sean Herman as he found out with everyone else. 

Belle stood by the door seeing she was catching the end meeting to a Storybrooke Model Congress meeting Ashley was on the council for. Alexandra, now fixing to turn five years old, was sitting in the corner with her father playing dolls. Belle only had to wonder briefly if Neal and Gold ever played sweetly like that. She knew there were no happy family memories between the two when Neal was younger and his mother was still around. She placed a hand on her own stomach again thinking about the past and what kind of parent she would be, if ever given the chance. If it were she and Gold and Christmas morning with little ones running…

“Belle! Long time no see, how have you been?” The meeting apparently had been adjourned when Belle was thinking of her own things. Ashley bounded up and hugged her.

“Decent, I guess. It looks like every thing’s well on your end, too?” Ashley nodded, looking back over her shoulder.

“I don’t think he’s ever going to work up the gumption to propose, but we are happy. But! I don’t think that’s what you came all the way over here for?” Belle motioned her out into the hallway so they could speak in private.

“I know Thomas used to hang out with Neal Cassidy and Gaston. Does he still? I need to speak with…either of them.” Ashley nodded, understanding what that actually meant.

“Gaston’s a physical therapy major, so I would guess he’d be down in the gym right about now. It closes at six. Are you okay?” 

Belle’s answer was strained. “I am in a better place.” 

Ashley shuddered. “I got chills when you said that. Here, take my number if that changes. Ruby and Dorothy’s got it too. Mary Margaret did, but I haven’t seen her lately to ask.” Belle nodded. This was as good as place to start as she thought.

Belle very slowly made her way to the school gym a level below the main ground in what used to be the on campus laundromat. Gaston was in the corner speaking with Neal, just as she expected him to be. Gaston had been one of the ones in Neal’s circles that got him in worse trouble than any other ‘friend’. She only dated him so Neal could hang out with him and have Belle as an excuse. Everything was beautiful, wonderful, first boyfriend type new and exciting. When it started out the ending wasn’t in sight. He was her first everything, something Gold was aware of but didn’t seem to mind, but a very big mistake. Nothing like what she saw was going down between Gaston and Neal. 

Neal caught one glance at Belle and bolted out of the gym in the opposite direction. The feeling of getting rejected from her best friend struck a chord in her body that hurt way worse than his distancing all summer. At least then he had the excuse. But Belle didn’t let her feelings deter her. She needed to know something crucial to his and, right now more importantly, Emma’s well being. If she wasn’t going to get it from him the civilized way, she had no choice than doing things his way. She marched herself over to Gaston and snatched the brown bag off of the floor before he could. 

“I’ve got a lot of homework to do so you better make this easy for yourself.” 

“What do you want to know, sunshine?”


	4. Gaston's Secret

Belle crossed her arms over her chest. Her kind blue eyes narrowed at her ex-boyfriend as he dared acting like this was just a normal conversation to have. She had thought he was taking supplements back in junior year, but nothing like this. Gaston’s face tightened at the judgmental look. Belle already knew exactly where this was going to go and braced herself for it. She placed a hand on her stomach. 

“You’re very lucky that’s not what I’m here to talk about.” Gaston relaxed and closed the distance between their bodies. He placed a hand on the wall by her head.

“Miss me now that you’re life is gone all wrong?” He leaned in to kiss her which she dodged. She went out from under his arm remained still.

“Not in the slightest. I need to ask you something.” Gaston didn’t look to sure, or intimidated. “I can find out what’s in this bag very easily.” That got his attention. He reached for it and she drew back. 

“First tell me something. Tell me how Neal would react if I told him I was pregnant.” If Neal would stand by her through this and help just like the father should, she knew he would stand by Emma. If he didn’t then, well, he wasn’t the guy she believed in. Gaston, however, froze.

“Is it…is it mine?”

“That’s not what I asked you. I know he’s talked to you. I know how close the two of you are and not just in the way that he’s your dealer.” Belle pushed the bag into his chest. It busted open and she gaped seeing something that was not steroids. It was powdery. And white.

“You fucking bitch! What the fuck is wrong with you?” Gaston yelled, face growing red and stuffing what he could into the pocket of his gym shorts. 

“Is this why you…why you…” Belle’s chest tightened as that part of their relationship became clear. She hugged herself. 

“I hope to fuck that you are prepared for Cassidy’s reaction. Because this…this is mild.” 

Belle backed out of the gym as memories started flashing to the forefront of her mind. Holes in walls, holes in walls, hospital visits, hospital gowns, tears, blood. Nobody in this entire town ever knowing. Nobody ever asking. Everyone always staring. Neal’s guilt. Gold finding her passed out on the back lawn and cleaning her up. Every morbid detail of her life, he knew and he could still look at her the way that he did. He still wanted to hookup with her this last summer. Her body wanted to crawl back to him on her knees for that comfort, but she couldn’t do it. She had to find Neal and figure out if what Gaston had said was true. 

On her way towards the parking lot where she saw Neal hanging around Emma’s yellow bug, she called Gold. He asked if she had been crying no matter how much she tried to hide it. She didn’t answer and just asked to stay with him all night tonight instead of just a celebratory dinner. They wouldn’t have to talk, he never made her. He would just take it all away for a few hours. She even kissed him goodbye the closer she got to Neal’s car and hung up before Gold could get a reaction in edgewise. Emma looked towards Belle and nodded. She gave her excuse to Neal and kissed him quickly before hopping in her car and driving off. Neal turned around and stood frozen.

“Belle? What happened to you?” In her anger and aching body, she began hitting him with her book bag over and over. Not hard. Just enough for him to understand. Belle finally stopped and engulfed him.

They sat down on the sidewalk to have the long awaited conversation. Neal blamed himself for her not going to Princeton like she always talked about. She promised him that wasn’t going to happen. Things had just gotten so out of hand and ahead of her at the end of senior year that she never found a moment to tell him. He then switched blame on himself due to the fact that he kept going out with Emma and didn’t make time for his best friend to explain anything. There was something else he wasn’t telling her when she brought up the bonfire, but that was a conversation for another time. He had gotten drunk anyway and probably wouldn’t remember. 

Finally, Belle asked how his relationship with Emma was going. She had never seen him so happy. He confessed to Emma being his first time and that he wanted to tell her he loved her. They had been together for a short amount of time, but he wanted to travel all over the world with her from Paris to Milan to Tallahassee, Florida. It didn’t matter where he went, he wanted Emma to be his passenger. Or his driver. As long as they were together he couldn’t care less. Belle found this a nice leeway to ask what if Emma got pregnant. She worried, blood running cold, when he suddenly got very serious.

“I would want to do that right thing, I guess. I don’t know what I would do if she didn’t want to keep it. I know how you feel about that.” Belle shook her head and placed a hand on his shoulder.

“I think that’s a good answer. You two should talk about it. Just in case.” Belle kissed his cheek and hugged his shoulders tight. 

“Does this mean you’ll be okay with us having a movie night? I think we were up to the letter ‘N’.” She grinned, squeezing him much tighter that he remembered their tradition.

Every other Saturday night since the eighth grade Belle was at Neal Cassidy’s house with food according to the letter of the alphabet they were on. He would choose the movies. It took about four movie nights for her crush to develop on Mr Gold. She even wanted to change it to every Friday night to have something to look forward to. Tonight, however, wasn’t about that. She knew Gold would understand. She called him while she was in her own kitchen mixing up nacho cheese and crunching chips in with it so they wouldn’t have to argue about double dipping. She hitched her book bag onto her shoulder, containing her laptop and every book she’d need to do homework. 

She walked over to the Gold’s house and stopped for a moment to adore the pink color of it. Normally she’d just march right in, but she refrained. For Neal, she had to pretend like she hadn’t been over here as often as she did. They only made her wait a few seconds before she heard Neal call and ask his dad to get the door. She bit back the smile hearing Gold’s cane against the floor. Their smiles lingered at each other, happy to be in the company for just a second. 

“Hello, Ms French. Have your homework done?” Belle quirked an eyebrow and slid by him. 

“Are you joining us for dinner? I brought nachos.” She asked, making herself comfortable in the kitchen. She set down the casserole dish she carried the entire thing in on the counter.

“Sad to say I’m not. Much as I do miss your cooking.” 

“So you’re eating out tonight?” She asked with ease coming back to the living room. She dropped her book bag on the floor in front of the couch and the laptop case on the table.

“I was planning on it actually.” If Neal wasn’t any second from bounding down those steps, Belle would have tackled Mr Gold down to the floor then and there. Gold licked his lips and looked up at the stairs while she averted her gaze. He went forward and held her face. “You sounded so upset on the phone. Are you alright?”

Her heart dropped. He cared so much. Belle reached up and held his face between her hands. “I am. Had a…not decent conversation with Gaston.” 

“Neal’s only here because you are. If you start feeling…not okay, you know where to find me.” Belle nodded, relinquishing him as he pulled back. 

“Right where I need you to be, Mr Gold.” She smiled. Neal trotted down the stairs and presented a DVD she once had watched with Gold down here herself. 

“Found it. I know how much you absolutely love it.” 

“This? This is what you want to watch for our first movie night together?” 

“What?” He asked, going over to put the movie in. “The Notebook is a classic.” 

“This movie is terrible!” Belle exclaimed with a laugh. Gold had thought it would have been romantic, but she just spent a good deal mocking it and kissing him.

“It’s this or Napoleon Dynamite. Besides, you’re going to be doing homework all night.” Neal gave the ultimatum, but he didn’t look the least bit offended as she laughed so hard her sides hurt. 

Belle got through three assignments after Gold retreated to his own room and Neal agreed to help. He ate vastly more of the nacho and chip dish than she did and let her educate him on the importance of checking his bowels after this. For the entire movie she made fun of his new excrement habits and how much Emma was going to adore this. After she got finished with enough work for the night, they sat back and talked seriously for a moment. She asked about something that had been bothering her all day. 

“Why are you and Emma and Mary Margaret and Nolan moving in together?”

“Am I not allowed to?” Belle tried not to let that hurt her. She stared down at a spot on the table. She stood up to get ready to go home until her phone rang. She had a few missed texts from Ruby, all of which just said a variant of hey, but thought nothing of it until then.

“Ruby? Sweetie, what’s wrong? No, no. I’m not busy. You actually just saved me from a terrible conversation.” She cast her glance towards Neal who just rolled his eyes and took their plates to the kitchen. “Yeah. I’ll be there very soon.” 

Belle picked up her bags over her shoulder and hurried out of the house before Neal could get back from the kitchen. This was without her saying goodbye to Gold as well, but she figured Neal could explain their conversation in enough detail for him to understand. Right now, the feelings of either her best friend and lover was not at the top of her radar. Ruby meant the world to her. She had been through every single thing with her who knew more than Neal did. Whatever bothered Ruby hurt Belle seeing as they never had anything negative to talk about that often. Something was definitely going on.


	5. Ruby's Secret

Ruby was parked down the street in her gorgeous red car. Belle hurried down the sidewalk, ignoring the bag knocking against her hip. She stayed on the phone with her until she arrived at the passenger’s side and slipped into it. She dumped her stuff in the backseat and turned her body to face Ruby who was in absolute tears. There were a countable number of times that Belle had ever seen Ruby without her makeup. Even when they had sleepovers, the next morning it was all perfectly done. Eyebrows and hair included. There was never an instant where she didn’t look at her absolute best whether it be at work in the diner or at an outside tennis match in the blazing sumer sun. Right now she had cleaned her face off completely. 

People were spreading rumors about Ruby and Dorothy. Explicit things that made her physically sick. Belle wanted to smile and assure she had nothing to worry about considering they weren’t true, but she didn’t know if that was right. Ruby never let rumors bother her and gods knew that there were many spread in high school. Most all to do with her sexuality. This was no different, but it was hurting her in aggressive ways. Ruby was cracking apart and it was only a little to do with what people were saying. Part of it Dorothy’s reaction that had made her heart break apart in its rib cage.

“She won’t talk to me about this. How are we meant to take care of it?” Ruby sobbed, wiping her eyes on her palms. Belle moved to sit in the middle to hug and hold her dear friend. Belle rocked her back and forth while rubbing her back in soothing motions until Ruby could breathe without choking.

“I know it’s two very different things, but you have stood by me in my time of need. I will be right here for you until Dorothy is ready, alright?” 

“If either of us were a man it wouldn’t be this big of a deal. I wouldn’t have to be so scared of…of…” Belle ran cold, understanding what Ruby was insinuating. She hugged her even tighter.

“My darling friend.” She tried easing. It was a terrible thing to watch her suffer. She needed Ruby to know that she was going to have more people than she thought to stand by her. “I will still love you. Granny will still love you. Maybe Dorothy is just scared as you are.” 

“She is never scared, not of anything.” Ruby denied, shaking her head against Belle’s chest. Her body jolted as the tears kept trying to drown out the world.

“Having your emotions treated like that is a scary thing. Even the bravest soldiers hide.” Ruby sat up to turn the air on while she fanned herself. She was always a person of action, but running away was never going to help this. Much as she wanted to. Belle remained in her seat to wait for what Ruby wanted to do next.

Belle considered herself stolen for the night as Ruby went through a drive through to grab milkshakes and food for herself. She apparently hadn’t eaten in a few days. Being so nervous about getting attacked and rejected placed a pit in her belly she wanted to throw up. Having cried it out instead on Belle’s shoulder had indeed helped. She believed Belle when told they were going to stand by this together. Of course, Ruby would never know this until Belle was put through the trials and tribulations. They were both in very taboo relationships that would ruin their lives if exposed, but they both knew Ruby’s danger. 

They decided not to lament on this fact and turned their attentions to other things. Neal changing the plans of he and Belle moving in together during college to begin the next chapters of their life. Ruby was then five times as angry about Neal doing this with other people instead and wanted to turn around to go fight him. Belle, instead, decided that she and Ruby should move in together. Then they would have a safe place to spend with their lovers, if Dorothy wanted to continue that of course. They could have a happy, carefree life in secret. Belle wouldn’t reveal her relationship with Gold until Ruby did with Dorothy as her own sign of solidarity. 

“Oh, no. I pulled you away from date night, didn’t I?” 

“With Neal, yes. Even if I was in the middle of the most amazing sex ever, I would leave for you. It might take me a minute to get dressed of course, but,” Belle smiled when Ruby left. 

“Have you told him you want it to be serious yet?” Ruby asked. Belle thought for a minute.

“I won’t do that either until you can. I won’t do anything until you do it first.” Belle raised a pinky which Ruby hooked around it. 

“Thank you. Shall I take you home?” 

“No,” Belle answered with a sigh. “I don’t want to risk facing Neal. It’s been a very long day, I might as well go sleep at my own house.” 

Mr Gold understood that Belle didn’t want to come over after talking with Ruby. She didn’t tell him anything about her day other than the fact that it was way more stressful than freshman year in high school and applying to colleges combined. She didn’t know the next time they would be able to spend time together. Gold pointed out all that meant was that next time he wouldn’t have to take his time. Belle groaned, cursing him for teasing her like that. She then, shyly, asked if he wanted to try a little something. They went through every little detail they would have done if this were a date night during the sumer. She even talked him through things they agreed on not doing so she wouldn’t get hurt. They talked late into the night until she forced him to get his old man’s sleep to be ready for the rest of the week.

Which went by with a drag. Belle was now harboring Emma being pregnant, Gaston being on drugs, Ruby having serious affection for a female, and all of her own secrets. Homework, essays, required reading, study groups, it all gave her an excuse to not think about any of it. Her pursuit of a bachelor’s degree with a major in children’s literature, what she intended on getting a PhD in later, and a minor of library science took up a great deal of her time. The only people she ever saw more than once a week over the next few was Ruby and Mary Margaret by extension. Ruby came out to Blanchard and the kindred soul helped them find an apartment. 

It was October by the time that anything changed. Emma started showing only to those that knew. She was thin anyway and only looked like she was just indeed gaining weight. Most of her classes were in the afternoon so there wasn’t many missed for morning sickness. She and Belle spoke in the library about it rarely. Emma wasn’t going to tell Neal until she figured out what she wanted to do herself, she wasn’t going to tell Mary Margaret out of fear of the mothering judgment, and she wasn’t going to tell anybody else for the same reason. Belle gave her the address of a doctor she knew to be very good with secrecy. More rumors spread about Ruby than they had about Emma, so Belle figured it must be working.

Twenty seven hours after Belle told Mr Gold that she was looking for an apartment with Ruby something affordable opened up. They moved in over the weekend with David Nolan’s help, seeing as he, Blanchard, Neal and Emma lived a floor below them. This definitely was Gold’s work. If he did anything at all for Belle it was try to get her to talk to Neal. Indirectly putting them in the way of an apartment where she could both be with Gold at her whim and eventually run into Neal worked for everybody. She had looked into it once, but more work than they were able to pay needed to be done. Miraculously, it was taken care of very quickly. 

“Looks like you’ve got a guardian angel.” Nolan praised after all of the boxes were moved from his truck into the makeshift living of a studio. 

“Or a golden one.” Ruby muttered with a wink to her friend. They heard the sound of a voice on static coming from David Nolan.

“I gotta get out of here. Break in at Her Majesty the Mayor’s place again.” He excused himself. They waved a hand as he ran out of the apartment.

“We’re going to have to work out a schedule for when you bring the Professor over for extracurriculars.” Belle flushed and propped her feet up on a box in front of them.

“Let’s get you squared away first.” Belle leaned against her shoulder and yawned. A knock came at the door and Belle went to retrieve it. She stood, dumbfounded at seeing Dorothy there. 

“Is Ruby here? Nolan said he just helped you guys move in.” Belle looked over her shoulder to see Ruby shaking her head, eyes pleading. “Oh, um. Don’t say it. I understand. Just tell her when she’s ready…” 

Belle’s heart swelled at the slight admission. That was all Ruby had wanted. “She will be so glad to know that. Give her some time, okay?” Dorothy nodded and turned to go down the stairs again. 

Ruby didn’t say anything about the encounter after Belle shut the door, so it wasn’t pressed. They unpacked the things that brought from home, thrilled to finally have a place of their own. Granny hadn’t been too happy about it, neither had Moe by a long shot, but they were free. Ruby had only worked as hard as she did in high school to go to college and get away from working the diner for a time in her life. She loved it and wouldn’t mind waitressing and managing the diner as a full time living, but not during the prime of her life. Belle didn’t want to stay in Storybrooke in the first place. Having gotten scared out of going to Princeton by her father’s terrible words, she stayed put. Both girls needed their escape and found a lot of it in each other.

“Phone’s ringing!” Ruby called to Belle who was putting up her books. Belle looked at the clock and smiled. He was a good twenty minutes early, but it was definitely welcome. She skipped out into the living room where she left her cell and smiled until she saw the caller ID. 

“Sheriff Nolan?” 

“Queen Mayor is asking to see you. It’s unofficial business, but she said it was urgent.”


	6. Regina's Secret

This was it. This was the moment her entire life was going to come crashing down. Mayor Mills knew about her relationship with Rum Gold and was going to ruin everything. Because she had been a bit careless and had left him a love note mixed in with her latest assignment. She knew that he checked them and had known about the note, as she had texted him of the surprise, but now she wasn’t entirely sure. What if someone had gotten to the stack before he did? What if her father took them to court over this despite her being a legal, consenting adult. If they took her to the stand she would do nothing but tell of her love for him if that’s what it took. 

Would he do the same for her sake? Or would he take all the blame? 

Regina Mills just in her mid to late twenties, but she and her entire family had been in power for a long time. Her mother had been Mayor prior, but the death had left it to Regina out of loyalty or fear. She appointed the position to herself to save from having an unnecessary trial when no one else had planned on running. She was tall, shoulder length brown hair she constantly wore in the same style, and dressed with every thread on her body stitched to match her angles. Belle had not been so scared of another human being for quite some time as she walked through the police tape after Nolan’s instructions were relayed to the other policeman.

Madame Mayor stood in front of her large house with her hands perfectly held in front of her. She smiled at Belle as the young French girl strolled up fiddling with her fingers. She wished she had taken time to at least say goodbye to Gold. Her relationship with him hadn’t meant a thing up until right now when it was threatened. She wanted him there to help take this burden away from her. But all promises to Ruby were going to be held true instead. They needed to be, she had to remember that. She would be granted a so long to her beloved. Ruby would never be given the same gratification if the roles were reversed. In the issue of lover versus best friend, Belle would choose Ruby. It would hurt and neither would want that, but she would.

Gold would understand.

“Good evening, Ms French. I understand you are in quite the predicament. I think I can help.”

“Help?” Regina motioned for Belle to follow her. Belle did as was asked. Her phone rang in her pocket. 

“Go ahead and answer that. Meet me inside after, take your time.” Belle nodded and waited until Regina was inside the house. She sighed seeing that it was who she wanted to talk to.

“I’m so glad you called.”

“I never get that reaction. It’s my time to, are you alright?” Belle rubbed her forehead. She didn’t know how to explain what she didn’t know.

“I’m standing at the Mayor’s house. She wants to-”

“What? That sneaky, conniving little-”

“I don’t think it’s this.” Belle assumed that was his reaction. “Just…I’ll talk to you later.” 

“Of course, dearie. If you get in any trouble,”

“I know where to find you. Thank you.” 

The soothing conversation placed her in better spirits. Knowing that Gold was angry at Regina just knowing she asked for Belle to come over made her feel better. He would fight for her just as easily as she would leave him for Ruby. Out of…helping each other. What was better for the other. Which is what Ruby and Dorothy were doing to each other, she realized as she stepped into the great foyer of Regina Mills’ home. The Mayor was sitting drinking tea in the dining room. Belle walked forward, trying not to get to distracted by the glorious mansion. Belle crossed her arms overhear chest, keeping her phone tight in her hand and thumb on the call button if things went awry.

“No thank you.” Belle declined when Regina picked up the teapot. “I drink anything right now, I’ll be up all night.” 

“Ms French, I’m going to be frank with you.” The gracious hostess smile faded from her face. Now before Belle was the serious and scary woman that could elect herself mayor at a young age. Belle swallowed and nodded. She turned down the volume on her phone and hit the call button. What she didn’t know at that time, was that Ruby had just texted asking if everything was going alright.

Belle placed the phone on the table. 

“I know that a certain classmate of yours is pregnant. Two months along, actually, and not a clue on what she’s going to be doing with it.” 

Belle wanted to hang up the call, but any sudden movement would look suspicious. Okay. So she would have to deal with this sooner than expected. She remained silent.

“I want you to convince her to relinquish the child over to me. I can raise the baby as my own. Give him or her a wonderful home, as you can see. She, well…you know the father.” Belle tensed. She couldn’t defend Neal without the person on the phone finding out this way. 

“I don’t think I can do that.” Belle breathed, looking down at her hands folded neatly in her lap. 

“Oh, yes you can. And you will, but I’m hoping we can do this without it coming to alternatives. Here is my proposal.” Regina pulled a briefcase onto the table and unlocked it. She removed a file and slid it to Belle. 

Inside was a transcript of a 911 call from that night between the operator and the person who had claimed Belle started that bonfire on purpose. Another call was a person claiming to have done it them self out of anger. With hands shaking and tears burning her eyes, Belle could hardly read the names without wanting to fall under the table and cry. The reason that she had spent five years locked up in her house with a father that did not love her was sitting right in front of her. The reason that she and Gold were stuck in a hotel room during the trial was right here. Everything. Except for a name. It had been removed, the page numbers going from eleven to thirteen. She looked to Regina.

“That name was what had been stolen. As you can see, the house is in perfect order. Someone is going through great detail for you not to know they ruined your life.” Belle looked to Regina and studied her face.

“But you know who they are. Don’t you?” A smile placed on Regina’s face again as she leaned forward. Her voice right above the phone.

“Convince Emma to give me the child and so will you.” Regina leaned back in her seat and motioned Belle away. 

Belle grabbed her phone and hung it up as she hurried to get as far as possible away from the house. She looked at the device, petrified at what she was going to explain to Gold that she knew he may be, fixing to be, a grandfather. All she had wanted was for that conversation to have been heard by someone in case Regina bit down on her neck and sucked her blood like she looked like she was going to. Instead she got something way worse. It was only getting better once she finally saw that call had been to Ruby. So now her best friend was going to find out that she had kept a secret. And she was going to tell Mary Margaret who was going to confront Emma who she had sworn never to tell any of this to. Neal was going to find out. 

Neal didn’t know everything, but a collaborative effort with Ruby would fill in the blanks. Regina’s one sentence wasn’t just going to ruin every life Belle held dear, but her own as well. Gold would never stand by her after this. She would be all alone. In a moment of bravery, at risk of all of this, Belle ignored Ruby calling her back and made her way to the Gold house. She needed advice and to feel that love from Gold one more time. Their relationship was never going to last, but he made it feel like the end was nowhere in sight. He would know what to do with her body and mind. 

Belle was already shivering and crying again during the very long walk. Her world fell around her seeing multiple cars parked in front of the salmon house. Neal’s bike. Emma’s yellow bug. David Nolan’s truck. Ruby’s red corvette. All waiting like Regina had killed Belle and they were attending the funeral. She stood staring at the house. Then she sat down on the sidewalk staring at the house, followed by sitting in the rain while staring at the house. Going home meant facing all of them, but going back to the apartment meant running away. Gold truly couldn’t fix this. She put her face in her hands and sat there. What was their lives worth to her if she kept secrets from all of them?


	7. Belle's Secret

Belle placed a hand on her swollen belly. She was three months along and unsure of if she was ready to be a parent just yet. She was going to the same clinic Ashley Boyd was for her checkups and everything was running smooth for the both of them. There was a complete outline of their children. Ashley had found out hers was going to be a girl, but Belle had kept it secret. Everything was secret with her. There were only three people who had known she was even pregnant. Four, because she had told Gaston, but he never seemed to care. He was training.

She had brought the ultrasound pictures with her to show Gaston thinking it might help make her own decision. She wanted to carry him or her full term, but after that was completely bleak. Her father… her father had all but thrown her out. Thank god Mr Gold was understanding enough about this. Sweet, caring, compassionate Mr Gold. She had gone out with Gaston to get over her high school crush, but it never went away. Not for a minute. The night her little baby had been conceived, she foolishly pictured him instead of Gaston. It had been the best night of her life. 

That wasn’t the mistake here.

Gaston was furious about Belle showing him the pictures of their child together. How the fuck am I supposed to take care of a child.

BANG. 

How the fuck am I going to take care of a child.

CRASH.

Why the hell do you think I can give a fuck about this thing.

WHACK.

Before her head could hit the pavement once more, Belle woke up. She placed her hands on her stomach, but the pain of having her baby ripped from her in a careless instant was long gone. All that left was the surgery scars and messed up body from Gaston’s abuse. Three broken ribs hadn’t taken her child away. Gaston had. Now there was a too small tombstone in the cemetery to mark the memorial. Something that had been Mr Gold’s idea. Belle went there every month afterwords to commemorate a new month and explain her sorry. Why had she been trusted with all of these secrets when she couldn’t be trusted with the life of another person?

“Nightmare, dearie?” Gold asked from the chair near the bed. It was then she realized she was in his house, in his room. Fuck.

“The day the light went out.” Gold frowned and went over to her. She cried against his shoulder. He had to have known how she lied to him about being a grandfather, how she knew about everything. Why was he doing this to her? 

“You do that when you’re under stress. Look at me.” He caressed her face until she did. “None of that was your fault. You are a beautiful person inside out. You deserve the world on a string.”

“Where is everybody? I saw them all parked outside.” Rum laid her back on the bed and moved in next to her.

“I sent them home after Neal saw you faint. I’m right here, sweetheart.” Belle rolled and pulled him tight. This was all she wanted anyway. Rum lifted her shirt and brushed a thumb over one of her scars as he kissed her. 

“You’re always right where I need you.” He nodded, wrapping his arms safely around her. Belle shifted just slightly where she could rest her body atop him. “Make love to me, Rum Gold.”

They had done this countless times, but never once had she called having sex making love. Belle was actually quite explicit in bed with him. It showed her desire to have him between her legs ran all through his body. The light had gone out of her life the day her child was gone, but Rum became her light house. She caught glimpses of it reaching the darkest parts of the stormy, clouded mind. She kept swimming, never stopping, to reach him. The moon to her ocean waves, even. Whatever metaphor fit. She wasn’t picky. 

Once it was over and they lay naked underneath his usually pristine white sheets, he outlined her face. Belle caught his hand and nipped at the tips of his fingers. When she was playful like that, he knew she was back with him and not in the scariest places. Rum had watched her become the strongest whom in all of Storybrooke. Her nightmares were real. Her fears had already happened and they threatened to take her from him permanently. They almost had after that bonfire. He had taken care of it before Neal begged him to. Here they were, just a few months later. He could hear music playing looking at her sleeping.

Just as every other morning, Rum was awake before her. He watched Belle’s slender, outrageously beautiful body sit up. She was going to go to the bathroom to pretend like she always woke up looking the way she did. This morning, however, he placed a hand on hers and easily tugged her back into his arms. He wiped away the tears running down her face and cradled her sweet face. When they got up and went down those stairs, that would be it for who knew how long. Belle must have known this too, because she placed his hands to her chest.

“You’ve left enough clothes here to warrant your own drawer. Take care. I’ll see you downstairs.” Belle grumbled about moving and kissed under his chin. “Belle.”

“Hmm?” 

“So, so tempting.” She pressed a smirk into his neck.

“I am yours, Professor Gold.” 

“I think I’m more yours. But they’ll be back this morning.” Belle stopped, but her fingers dug into his skin. “I’m going to be right there with you, sweetheart. You are not doing anything alone anymore.” 

Belle showered and found that he stocked his bathroom with the shampoo and soap she used as well as tampons and pads underneath his sink. He had a list of makeup items and a curling iron and straightener to get as well. She smiled, shaking her head. Rum had cared for every aspect of her life and made sure she would want for not. She dressed, finding her clothes pushed back in his closet or hidden underneath his in the drawers. Much as she wanted to just wear his robe and take him back to bed where it was safe away from the world, she wouldn’t. He didn’t help heal her to be a coward.

After Gold’s divorce to Milah, Neal had stayed with his father out of force. Neal had taken his mother’s last name out of a sign of rebellion and never changed it. In this time, Belle remembered watching Mr Gold enter into his own depression. He was there physically taking Neal to school and continuing his job as a lawyer, but not physically. She and her father had baked cookies and brought happy books for him to help, although Moe had claimed it was stupid to even try. Belle had been there for Mr Gold even in his darkest of times. Now he was there for her. 

Dorothy and Ruby were sitting on the sofa nearest the window, Mary Margaret and David Nolan by each other on the one in front of the coffee table, and Emma and Neal on the love seat. Rum was in the kitchen loading the dishwasher. She patted his shoulder as she walked by him and went into the living room by herself. Emma took the remote from Neal and turned off the television as they all addressed her.

“So, for starters, I never told a soul anything any body’s told me.” Belle began, walking in and standing before them all. “Except, Emma, I knew that Mr Gold was going to find out. I had meant to call him instead of you, Ruby.” 

“You shouldn’t have called anybody.” The first thing Neal had said in months to her. 

“Are you really going to tell me what I should and should not have done, Neal?” 

“She’s right. You have got to get over the fact that Belle is sleeping with your dad.” Ruby defended. Why, Belle had to wonder. 

“May be, but Neal hasn’t done anything that warrants you saying that.” Emma stood by her boyfriend. Belle looked towards Neal. She didn’t want to say out loud in front of everyone more secrets, but she hadn’t forgotten about him dealing to Gaston.

“Yeah, but she’s been sleeping with him since the moment she turned eighteen.” Neal shook his head, standing up ready to leave.

“What?” Everyone in that room except for Neal said at the same time. Belle, Ruby, Gold, and Dorothy because they knew it not to be true. “I heard you talking to Ruby. I have nightmares about it.” 

“You know what I have nightmares of? Losing my child because Gaston was on heroin and didn’t want to give up that money in exchange for a child. So if I thought for a moment your child’s best bet was to go to Regina, then I’m not sorry.” Neal hadn’t known the part about the drugs. It showed on his face. 

Belle then addressed Emma.“I wasn’t going to make that decision for you. I just wanted the option to be as available as possible.”

“Regina is the last person you should want being a parent to your child.” Gold said as cool and poised as he entered the room.

“A lot of people said the same about you.” Belle pointed out.

“Wait until they find out he’s been sleeping with my best friend.” 

“You couldn’t be more wrong about their relationship.” Ruby continued to defend. 

“Not by a long shot.” Belle smiled her thanks. “But our relationship has nothing to do with this.” 

“Actually it does.” Neal stood up. 

“Neal-”

“No, Emma. If we’re getting this out she needs to know I was the one that told them she intentionally started that bonfire. I know what I heard you telling Ruby.” 

“Jesus Christ, Neal!” Belle exploded. “What you heard me telling her was that my heart was going to be ripped apart leaving because I know that if I did, he would be left alone. I have loved him far longer than I need to and that broke my heart.”

“You could’ve just kept your daddy issues away from my father.” Belle drew back a hand and slapped Neal across the face.

“I hope your child turns out exactly like you.” She swore through gritted teeth. Tears burned her eyes and she spun away on her heel to storm into the kitchen. Ruby went after her, Dorothy after not wanting to stay in the living room alone.

“I have only been sure that Belle loves two people in this world. One of them just walked out of here.” Gold said to his son. He hated everyone that took Belle’s love and ran over her with it. That Neal had done so, he felt such conflicting disappointment. “You’ve thrown that away by being so, painfully wrong.”

“I get it from mom.” Gold tightened his hold on his cane.

“If you leave just as well I understand.” 

“I won’t.” Emma stood, wobbling just a little bit. She was still trying to figure out how she should and shouldn’t move with a life inside of her. “I get that you’re mad as hell, but he has put you first your entire life. How could you walk out of his life completely because he and Belle are together? Why can’t you be happy that he’s with someone at all?”

“She’s eighteen and he’s going to be a grandfather. Am I the only one not seeing how bizarre that is?”

While Emma and Neal were arguing, Gold leaned against the back of the sofa and clutched his chest. Mary Margaret and David Nolan watched in worry that only escalated when Gold dropped his cane and collapsed onto the ground. Belle, hearing the escalated commotion, had her stuffed packed ready to just go back to the apartment and come back only when Neal and Gold were both okay with this. Her blood ran cold seeing them crowded around Gold. Ruby ran back into the kitchen to call the emergency line. 

Belle shoved everyone out of the way and found that he was still awake and conscious, just in excruciating discomfort and pain. Tears clouded here eyes as she caressed his face and placed his head in her lap to keep him comfortable until the ambulance arrived. Neal wanted to ride in the back with his father, but Belle knew Gold’s medical history, what medication he was meant to be on, every single little detail that Neal didn’t. For Gold’s health they let Belle remain at his side. She didn’t let go of his hand the entire way. 

She placed back and forth in the waiting room when they wouldn’t let her go into his room. Ruby kept quiet to let her think alone. Emma and Neal remained arguing amongst them self. Mary Margaret and David Nolan expressed their concerns and assured everything was going to be alright. Later, Belle would have appreciated it, but not right now. She wouldn’t feel comforted until she saw Gold’s eyes and heard him saying he was going to get through whatever had happened. When the doctors came out two hours later, they asked for Belle French who was on his emergency contact list. A surprise to everyone else. He was awake, stabilized, and asking for her. 

“Rum!” She breathed, stopping herself from running to him. “Thank you, Dr Whale.” Belle waited until the good doctor was out of the room before running to Gold’s side. She kissed his mouth, his cheek, his chin, his temples, everywhere over and over again.

“You shouldn’t be here.” 

“Who cares? You’re alive.” 

“I do.” Belle shook her head, pressing a firmer kiss into his neck. They had him attached to several machines to monitor his heart and an IV in his hand. She pulled a chair closer and took his hand in both of hers.

“I don’t. I’m in love with you. I don’t care what Neal or anybody thinks.” She would still wait until Ruby came out with Dorothy, but she wouldn’t tell him that. Pushing someone out of the closet was not something that she was going to do even by accident.


	8. What They Know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter contains brief sexual content and a 'daddy' talk innuendo. if that bothers you, stop reading after "Belle hugged him once more before sending him off". you won't be missing any important plot detail.

SEVEN MONTHS LATER.

Emma was due any day now. A boy, as of right now healthy, that she was going to give to Regina under restrictions. They would more or less share custody of little Henry Daniel so he would grow up with two moms and a dad. With the impression that Emma was convinced into this, Regina released the names. The 911 caller had not been Neal Cassidy as he had claimed. He was the one that said Belle was framed. The person who called and said Belle had been planning it was Moe French.

Belle didn’t cry or react at all finding this information out. She had lived with the man that had done way worse to her following the death of her mother. She had told Moe before anybody about her being pregnant, the minute that she found out herself. He had kicked her out. Painfully lucky for her, Moe was never home anyway between work and drinking. She was able to slip in and out of the house without anybody having ever noticed. After the miscarriage, Belle stayed for a little while at Granny’s bed and breakfast to recuperate before going back home. She told her father it was a fluke thing and he, begrudgingly it seemed, let her back in.

Having a place to go if Granny rejected her, Ruby came out to he rover the holiday break. Granny found out that Dorothy didn’t have too much of a family in Storybrooke and invited her there as a sign of solidarity. She was a little more put off by Belle’s relationship with Professor Gold than she was of girls loving girls, which both Ruby and Belle didn’t mind. Belle still had a place for Christmas dinner. She went only because Neal and Emma was going to be with Rum. She went to her boyfriend after and very rarely left his house. Her apartment with Ruby became Dorothy’s apartment with Ruby. They experienced homophobia to their faces just once. Mary Margaret had gotten arrested for assault, but only got a community service out of it. Gold had been her lawyer, David Nolan gave the testimony, and Regina didn’t want that kind of behavior in her town.

Following Gold’s heart attack, Neal had made the effort to get back on better terms with her. Belle alternated her weekends to spend equal amount of time with both the men in her life she adored. They hung out while Regina took Emma to the doctors appointments. Gold even had once or twice for the sake of his grandson and so all of them could be a happy family like Belle wanted. Since October, things had gotten better. Day by day they each made an effort. Belle didn’t think Neal ever would have if it weren’t for Emma’s wonderfully positive influence on him. He still got into trouble and dropped out of college, but he was now working harder than Belle ever had seen him. She was proud. He would be a good father.

At the end of their first year of college, she had gotten a congratulatory gift from her boyfriend in the form of, what he called, extra credit instructions. Ruby hadn’t answered when she called to express her excitement. She worried about going out without either of them due to the fact it was exactly a year ago that night the fire started. As she followed the directions, she was sent to an antique’s shop where he had a necklace waiting for her. From there, a dress emporium where one had been hand bought for her as well. A gorgeous pale yellow number that fit her every inch. She found out that Ruby was part of it when her friend dragged her aside to do her hair and makeup. Ruby wouldn’t give any detail which only made this more excitingly stressful. 

At the end of the day, Ruby drove her to the woods. If it were not for the tiny little lights on either side of the dirt pathway leading to the clearing where, exactly a year ago, Neal’s fire had been, she would have been petrified. In the section, Rum was waiting for her. A small dining table for two was covered with a white cloth, a bottle of wine in ice, and two dinners beneath a silver platter. He was standing there in a beautiful navy blue suit that she felt somehow matched hers. She ignored the dinner and went straight into his arms. The love of her life. Object of her desire. 

“And I thought sex in your office at school was adventurous.” She teased. Her nimble fingers unbuttoned his jacket so she could wrap her arms around him. He let her do what she wanted until that became removing his belt. Rum took her hands in his. She smiled up at him.

“That’s not why we’re here. I mean, later maybe. But, let’s sit down. I made your favorite.” 

“Are you going to let me drink with you tonight?” Belle curtsied as he pulled her chair out for her. The only pulling out she was going to let him do tonight.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. This is sweet iced tea.” She giggled as he winked at her. Rum sat down across and removed the silver platters. Full on laughter erupted from her seeing two burgers ordered from Granny’s. 

“Oh, I do love you.” She reached for his hand to bring it to her lips. Her smile froze as his thumb brushed against her lips. She lightly nipped at the tip of it and grinned at him. He adjusted his fingers to hold her chin then stroked underneath. She purred like a cat and let go of his thumb.

“I know. You love with more of your heart than anyone I’ve ever met. We can talk more about that in a bit. Go ahead,” he encouraged. 

“No, come on. Something is on your mind. You got me out here for a reason.” Belle reached for his other hand and held them over their dinners.

“Well, and you must listen to me because this is going to sound terrible. Neal and I have a bet. He thinks you and I will breakup before he and Emma get engaged.” Belle nodded. She did feel quite angry that Neal hadn’t grown out of his thinking her relationship wasn’t as real as his.

“And how much faith do you have in us?” 

“That depends.” Rum took his hands back and fiddled with his jacket. She gave him a questioning look. “Would you end things if I saw where this was headed and you didn’t?” 

“What do you mean?” In just a few short weeks, it would be the anniversary of their first kiss. Would he break up with her right now, out of fear of this being that serious? Her fears were calmed as he reached into the pocket of his suit jacket.

“I consider June twenty-seventh our anniversary. But, this night a year ago started it all. From this moment forward we were fighting together. I like fighting with you.” 

“I will always fight for you. If you’re asking me to marry you, my answer is a resounding yes.” Belle smiled, ear to ear with beautiful diamonds in her eyes. She stood from her chair and walked around to sit on his good knee. She took the box from him and smiled seeing the wrong he slipped onto her finger. Belle held his cheek, beginning to take this where she wanted earlier….

“Cut! Cut, before I officially get scarred for life!” Neal called, coming out with a video camera. Belle jumped, Rum holding her still.

“How long have you been there?” She really didn’t want Neal ever seeing what had almost happened she arrived. 

“Um, since you sat down with intentions of dinner. Did I miss anything? If it’s something that’s going to make me vomit, I don’t want to know.” Belle stood up and shrugged with a smug smile on her mouth. She didn’t say a word. She and Rum laughed as Neal groaned at the lack of an answer. It then hit her. 

“I’m engaged!” Belle squealed, unable to contain herself as she leapt forward and hugged Neal who had been recording the proposal. 

“I’m not calling you mom.” Neal stated, but hugged his longtime friend. “Henry’s growing up with two moms and a dad, and his grandmother is the same age as his dad.” 

Belle smiled against Neal’s shoulder. “Just wait until Gold and I have one.” She said, just to mess with him.

“Look, I’m having issues accepting you two are about to ce….celebrate.” He shuddered at the thought, but made it obvious he wasn’t being one hundred percent serious. He made extra efforts not to think about either of their sex lives before all of this. “I’m going to go fix this up for an actual engagement video. Thank you for letting me be part of this.” Belle hugged him once more before sending him off.

“You know,” Gold said, hugging her from behind. Belle’s smile turned into a smirk feeling his erection right against her. “I’m surprised you went with the us having kids thing instead of the you calling me ‘daddy’ lately.” Belle laughed, hugging his hands to her chest.

“I don’t call you that at all!” She turned around and let him push a passionate, almost desperately hungry, kiss into her mouth. “Mm, I don’t think it’ll beat the lawyer play. Or the professor. Or the…the..” Her voice trailed off as his calloused hands slipped up her dress and between her thighs. Talking about their best nights, thinking about it, had made her wet with desire. 

“I’ve got a video going as a back up.” He pointed towards a spot in the trees, his fingers massaging her though the underwear. Belle licked her lips and smiled towards it.

“Let’s keep it rolling. This will be our little secret.”


End file.
